Thursday, November 16, 2006


Sometimes, you learn something about someone else that really makes you say, "Wow." I often learn a little bit more about some bloggers - from who they are in real-life, to what they do, to specific things they've done, to how they act... and sometimes, those "Wows" are for the better, while occasionally (sadly) they are for the worst. Today, I learned something about another blogger that blew my mind.

Some people really go out of their way to do what they think is right - not because they have an ulterior motive, not because they get something out of it, not because they have a vested interest in it. Just because it's the right thing to do. They put in extra effort to understand a culture that's not "theirs", simply because they think it will help them understand situations that much better - again, when there's no reason for them to do so in the first place. Wow. I wholeheartedly applaud such good, good-hearted people.

On a somewhat related note, I was discussing perceptions with another blogger recently, and we wondered how close a blogger is in real-life to how they seem in the blogosphere. I am of the opinion that you can figure people out pretty easily in general (and perhaps even do, right Shoshana, Chana?) - even those who like to have fake personas - except perhaps the ones who specifically put forward true parts of themselves while keeping a chunk in reserve (see some of the contributors at SerandEz).

One person I spoke to even - only half-jokingly - suggested that to "solve the shidduch crisis", everyone should have a blog. It would help people really find people they match up with. [And, let people weed out those who they don't want to date.] Heh. I know MCAryeh has gotten shidduch offers from his blog, and Amishav kind of uses his blog for dating... Well, it would definitely be interesting to read, anyway. :P

Anyways, do you think people can 'figure each other out' through their blogs?


  1. Just passing thru, nice blog. I enjoyed reading your posts.

  2. Yes I have you figured out out as a political sports junkey:)

  3. From the couple bloggers I know in real life, I'd say you can get a pretty accurate impression from a blog, especially if they write a lot. Of course, for those with tightly-focused blogs, there's undoubtedly a lot you can't tell from just the blog.

  4. JBM - :)

    JA - Depends what you mean by tightly-focused... some of them are even easier to figure out, based on how they respond to commenters and the like even within that focus. It's probably the "matter-of-fact" bloggers who are the toughest to figure out in terms of personality.

  5. I think it depends on what they blog about and how strictly they hold on to their anonymity (or don't). It's funny that you posted this, cuz just last night I was quite surprised by a blogger who revealed a whole new side of themself to me. I don't think what I found out would have been what anyone would have guessed (but that's all I am allowed to say - sorry to keep you in suspense).

  6. I can't even relate to saving a bit of your persona!!!
    Besides leaving out my profession- which I reveal in other peoples blogs, my blog is me, I am my blog.

  7. Perceive this:

    Im going to the Idan Reichel concert tonight and I have two extra tickets.

  8. I'm nothing like my blog persona...I really live in the upper west side :)

    (just kidding!!!)

  9. He's not kidding. Jameel, better known as Yankel T. Booberich, lives alone, talks to the pidgeons at Central Park and dreams of the day he can move to Israel where he can be a cool settler sporting an M-16 and fancy wrist watch.

  10. Shoshana - I'm not sure - I think some of the anons are easier to read (because they're more open, seeing as how they're anonymous) while the others are a bit more "careful"...

    Kasamaba - That, we've noticed. :)

    HH - :P (Pay for a flight, I'll come...)

    Jameel - Heh. I thought you lived in Kentucky, raising chickens.


  11. HH - :P (Pay for a flight, I'll come...)

    You're the one with the fancy shmancy new job. You can afford a plane ticket.

  12. I don't know how others perceive me, but personally, my personality is more authentic on my blog than it appears in real life, I think. I am "free" to "be me" on my blogs, as opposed to in real life. The environment in which I live constrains the freedom I am able to express through blogging. I "survive" in the real world. I "live" in my blogs. Sad, but true.

  13. MT - Thanks!

    HH - Not yet...

    Liorah - Interesting point. I think that's probably true for many (usually anonymous) bloggers.

  14. i think you can 'figure out' people by looking at their blog but that depends on what they share.

    personally i think i'm more 'me' on my blog because it's a creative outlet and i enjoy that because there's no pressure from anyone else to be anything else. and if you read between the lines (and photos!) you could figure out a lot more than i would necessarily share in real life! (even though i can't go into specifics often.) so it's all real cos being fake just doesn't work for me. but even for others, even if it's a made up persona it's usually a reflection of some part of their personality.

    i've 'met' some wonderful people (eg: frum people in a creative industry) through their blogs and I feel it's a pretty good representation of them even though i've not met them in real life. there is still mystery but i reckon they'd be just as great as how they come across on their blog. Being so far away from most of the jbloggers, I often wonder what they are like in real life.

    (If one is single and looking does one need to advertise that on their blog to be useful for dating?! Hrm...)

  15. Mia - It's funny. Anonymous people "get to be themselves", while non-anons basically have to be.

    Sarah - Ya never know... :)

  16. Interesting subject, neighbor! As a very recent blogger, I am definitely still finding my way in figuring out what my blog is about. I think for me, so much of my day relates to the detailed functionality of the daily grind, that I like to blog about the thoughts I don't have the time or opportunity to share with people in my 'real' life. I think that in a lot of my real-life relationships I tend to be somewhat closed, and more of a listener than a sharer. Blogging is like that phone conversation I never wind up having where I can just . . . talk.

  17. 'non-anons basically have to be.'

    As a non-anon, I do have to monitor what I post because I have a job and family, so I don't write a lot of things that I would say in private. But other than that, I don't try to hide anything.

  18. well, eliezer chaim- i still dont think i've totally figured you out, and i've known the real you since before blogs were even invented. (: Maybe its cuz i dont PSYCHOANALYZE PEOPLE AS MUCH AS YOU!!! jokes jokes.
    anyhow, i think the reason many people blog is because they have what to say but don't say it out loud for whatever reason. course, i think comments tell a whole lot more about a person than the original post (excluding psychotoddler whose blog exudes wisdom and honesty). many people post peices that create discussion about deep issues, and often the commenters need to struggle to see where they stand. I'd say that blogging is a way of organizing one's thoughts, for many people.

  19. Yes. Absolutely. Some of my best friends are bloggers... No, that doesn't sound right! : )

    What I meant was, blogging is in many ways just like meeting someone in person for the first time. You can choose to have a general political discussion or a very personal conversation. In either case, you don't reveal all of yourself at once, and sometimes, depending on your relationship with the person, hardly anything at all. In short, blogosphere is a microcosm of real life in a special setting.

  20. RM - I understand that well :)

    CH - I think that's true for many. I meant 'have to be' in the sense you said it.

    PN - That's the idea! Nobody's supposed to figure ME out...

    I agree. It's also a great way of putting down one's thoughts for the future - from memories, to feelings, to opinions. It's almost like a picture of one's thoughts. (ooh, I like that metaphor!)

    Irina - :P

    Yes and no. As a certain blogger once said to me, in a way, it's better, because it's easier to figure out which people you'll relate to.

  21. I'm not sure I agree. From reading your blog, you seemed to be a nice guy, then I met you. ;)

  22. Jack - Uh huh.

    David - ROTFL. Silly man, you knew I was a Browns' fan... :P

    (Oh, Browns are winning Sunday.)

  23. i wonder if my posts will help me get a better shidduch...

    also, my posts are my way of finally being able to speak without being interupted. sucks to be the youngest!

  24. MordyS - Of course they will. If they hurt, you don't want to marry the person. :)

    And ROTFL - seriously, I can relate...

  25. My blog is living a much more exciting life than I am. I mostly just sit around in the basement in my undershirt playing Xbox.

  26. I think I'm somewhat funnier, louder, and more opinionated on my blog than I am in real life. Interestingly, through blogging, I have actually become a lot more like my online persona in my real life.

  27. PT - Niiice... :)

    Shifra - That *is* interesting. I wonder if that's true for a lot of people - that their blog helps them bring out their true selves...