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Thursday, May 15, 2008

My "Shidduch List"...

...as it stands right now. Let's see...what to do, what to do...

Snow White

--Thin, Pretty, Need to find out about family, Superior "wife" skills, Motherly, will keep a nice home, immature???, find out about living situation (what's with all the roomates)

Cinderella

--Thin, Pretty, No mother-Father remarried, $$$, Step-mom is difficult, aidel, kindhearted, good with kids, commited to her work, looking for a guy to take care of her

Alice

--Short, Too young??, outgoing, likes to have fun, find out if she has any real friends,

Sleeping Beauty

--Thin, Pretty, JAPy??, looking for her "prince" to come and save her, bland personality,

Jessica Rabbit

--CALL SHADCHUN TONIGHT!!!

Ariel

--Thin, Pretty, Dad is a mover/shaker VIP, No mother, very close to her family, needs to live close to home, little ditzy, creative, not career motivated

Belle

--Thin, Pretty, kind, baalas chesed, very friendly, find out about the family, broken engagement

Jasmine

--Thin, Pretty, No mom, Very nice father-influential in the community, $$$, outgoing, sheltered??, very much her own person, rebel streak

Pocahontas

--Thin, Pretty, sheltered childhood, sweet, very traditional, parents are very involved, open to new things

Yeah, I think you're right...definitely need to find out more details before deciding who's next.

Unless, of course, I hear that the Rabbit girl is available!!!

**If anybody can act as a reference for one of the above names please feel free to fill in any blanks**

56 comments:

  1. Hmm... all have in common: Thin/Pretty. Shocker.

    Also, watch that movie they're all in together (Shrek3?), you'll learn a lot more about how they all are.

    Also, definitely Ariel. ;)

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  2. what's with guys and ariel??

    ditto to ezzie's comment on "thin/pretty", sheesh!

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  3. Ariel will always be the first choice for guys. There's just something about her...

    G, that was hysterical. Don't you ever have work to do?

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  4. Re: Ariel

    first of all, she is a real redhead. Very exotic. Also, everyone has seen her in bikini, so there are no "mysteries" there. That said though, everyone has seen her in a bikini. Your call.

    As for Jessica Rabbit, she's married dude. Rabbit is actually her married name. I think she was a Greenblatt. So sorry.

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  5. Hmm.

    Aladdin
    Has the rugged scruffy look going on, steals things (dishonest?), not ambitious, doesn't really have a car or an apartment, talks to a monkey ... hmm

    Beast
    Big guy, prickly, needs a shave, yells a lot, lives in a really cold house and everything is dusty (possibly needs girl to take care of him), too set in his ways??

    Buzz Lightyear
    Big and brawny, cute smile, has wings??, takes a while to realize when he's being deluded, ambitious, father went off (but they are on friendly terms)

    Woody
    Tall and lanky, insecure, needs a lot of validation, a little bossy, very loyal, reckless, lives with an odd collection of roommates, has hero complex, kind of vulnerable - looking for someone to take care of him

    Peter Pan
    Short, kinda cute, immature, shirks responsibility, seems to have a jealous girlfriend in the picture, probably too young, parents seem to be not involved in his life

    Captain Li Shang
    Handsome, in good shape, strong personality, somewhat arrogant - needs a girl who can take him down a peg or too, can be judgmental, respectful of parents, responsible, has a good job

    Tarzan
    Lives in unconventional location, needs a haircut (probably better looking with short hair), seems to be somewhat clothing challenged, doesn't speak with the best grammar (ACK), grew up without parental influence, no career plan

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  6. Another common trait: most of them seem to lack mothers. You know what that means-- no mother-in-law.

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  7. re: apple's comment:
    Captain Li Shang
    Handsome, in good shape, strong personality, somewhat arrogant - needs a girl who can take him down a peg or too, can be judgmental, respectful of parents, responsible, has a good job

    he's one hot cartoon character. I don't know a single girl who saw Mulan and didn't have a crush on him.

    Tarzan
    Lives in unconventional location, needs a haircut (probably better looking with short hair),

    Sefira? Nazir?
    And how did he get rid of a beard if he hasnt cut his hair?

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  8. Jessica Rabbit. I don't care if she's married.

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  9. HH,Ezzie-

    Umm, yeah...

    A^2, SaraK-
    No idea, must be a thing about bikini's.

    xvi-
    I am aware of her status...it matters not

    Apple, A^2-
    Please do not cloud the issue with fictional "girls lists"...some things are just beyond make-believe.

    As to the common facts of no mother and thin/pretty:

    I honestly had not thought too much about the former, although it is something to take into account as Jersey noted.
    As for the latter...i don't make the rules - i just take down the information, and if they happen to be thin & pretty, well then who am i to argue...blame Disney.

    LWY-
    This is what I'm saying ;-)

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  10. Hint: Not the bikini, nor the "mermaid" factor. I'm guessing Xvi is closer to the truth.

    i don't make the rules - i just take down the information, and if they happen to be thin & pretty, well then who am i to argue...

    And here, I thought you were just saying that's how all girls are described... :P

    And really, LWY, G: Y'all go for the slut?! Shame on you both! :)

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  11. And they say GIRLS are shallow?

    Dish it --> take it

    ;)

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  12. The thing about Jessica Rabbit is that her husband is a criminal.

    What's that? You say he was framed? By whom?

    BTW: Ariel/Jessica Rabbit: both redheads. Make of that what you will.

    (G: I just got back from Disney and had a chance to meet some of these girls. Let me just say, the pictures on Only Simchas are a little flattering.)

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  13. Nala?????

    LOL

    Jessica is not a girl you marry. She is more of an after dinner entertainment. I meant playing patty-cake of course.

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  14. >And they say GIRLS are shallow?

    We never claimed to be anything more ;)

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  15. Jessica is not a girl you marry. She is more of an after dinner entertainment. I meant playing patty-cake of course.

    Exactly.

    If I had to marry a Disney character? Ariel. But only if she's a mermaid.

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  16. I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way...

    Uh huh...

    If I had to marry a Disney character? Ariel.

    Thank you!

    But only if she's a mermaid.

    ...I don't want to know...

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  17. >If I had to marry a Disney character? Ariel.

    exactly. smoking body and an awesome voice.


    >But only if she's a mermaid.

    Gives a brand new meaning to "sleeping with the fishes"

    BADABOOM

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  18. You forgot Esmerelda also: Thin, pretty, etc. Why didn't she make your list?

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  19. OK casting call. Who would play the parts in real life

    In this video, Jessica looks like Angelina Jolie

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8W4clbzAi8&feature=related

    And Esmerelda would be Selma Hayek. In fact, she already played her :P

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=V0PcYYrEckc

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  20. Are Men Necessary devotes almost an entire chapter to the way men have crushes on animations, particularly Jessica Rabbit.

    Also about how equally uninterested girls are in animated heroes.

    Isn't it nice to know you're typical and predictable?

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  21. So are all the girls you date thin & pretty?

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  22. >Why didn't she make your list?

    Shes Sephardic?

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  23. Belle

    --Thin, Pretty, kind, baalas chesed, very friendly, find out about the family, broken engagement


    and SMART.

    not ambitious

    Aladdin? Not ambitious? Hmmm. I beg to differ.

    Anyway, if we can move outside of Disney, I think Dimitri from Anastasia is pretty good looking.

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  24. Isn't it nice to know you're typical and predictable?

    That's one way of looking at things.

    The other is that I wrote it in a way that I knew would garner desired responses from different parts of the readership.

    So...right back at ya!

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  25. So are all the girls you date thin & pretty?

    I have the right to remain silent. Anything I say can and will be used against me in the future. I have the right to have an attorney present during questioning. If I cannot afford an attorney, well then I guess you're out of luck.

    Do you understand these rights I have just explained them to you?

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  26. Hard to believe that I'm actually jumping in here, but . ..

    What can I say - redheads just have a certain . . . charm. And a wicked temper, of course. Look OUT.

    And Erachet, once you go Russian, you never go back :)

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  27. Yeah, those cartoon guys have no personality whatsoever. And they all kind of look the same, too --> ugly.

    I like animal "guys" way more, for some reason! :D

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  28. Snow White
    likes to talk to animals- very pale, lives with a lot of guys (7)aka- lives on the west side, doesn't check hasgacha before she eats things and waiting for her PRINCE CHARMING!


    Cinderella

    likes to talk to animals, quit college to become cleaning lady, likes shoes,thinks everything in life needs to be magical...
    hence waiting for her PRINCE CHARMING!

    Alice

    also likes to talk to animals, plays pretend a lot (tea party),goes hrough her belimia, non- belimia stages, walks into strangers houses, not studious- so turned to drugs (particularly "shrooms").
    NOT waiting for her prince charming cus she gave up long ago...

    Sleeping Beauty
    also likes to sleep- dont know much about her since she sleeps her days away, prob talks to animals in her sleep... also waiting for prince charming!

    Jessica Rabbit- guys... she married a rabbit, obviously also talks to animals and is into guys with big ears!
    hangs out on the strip- from her closet can tell BY rebel- turned WHORE- therefore waiting for her charming Prince'SSSSS

    Ariel
    - talks to animlas, likes to sing (but you boys wouldn't know cus thats kol esha), so impressionable dosen't have her own voice-
    "KOL kevuda... but def. a bas melech" (though the melech likes to chase away her dates with a pitch fork), thats why she will wait for ever for her prince charming. Compensates for her lack of legs (first thing guys look at) with red hair dye and bikini made of shells!(starves herself with an aquatic only diet to fit into bikini).


    Belle

    also talks to animals- big wild "behema" ons, great date for most "prince charmings" since she does not judge guys from the outside... prob every guys best shot!likes roses!

    Jasmine

    into sefardi guys- likes carpets and also likes to talk to animals- very michevious, grew up as a cleptomaniac- expects prince charming to give her everything, by stealing.

    Pocahontas
    talks to animals...is into out of faith marriage. wants a farmer- waiting for her "john doe" (cant expect a prince to wanna live on a plantation).

    common thread- all talk to animals, all waiting for their prince charmings- therefore non of y'all have any hope!!!!!(except for with belle since she wont judge you by your looks). I think you guys have better chance with girls who talk to people(not animals), are shomer (don't judge the guy- who will woo them- aka prince charming by his kiss), basically most of these girls seem to have gone off the edge- call SHADCHAN tell them you don't date BROOKLYN girls!!!!!!!

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  29. ...Do you understand these rights I have just explained them to you?

    okay, okay, smart move :)

    i think this topic is more popular than what kind of cookie are you??

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  30. call me crazy, but i was always sort of attracted to jafar.

    and wakko from animaniacs.

    sigh.

    someday, my prince will come. and burp beetoven's fifth while keeping vivid watch over a sand timer.

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  31. Jasmine - Sefardis=HOT!

    (But is she Persian? Persian=Hairy)

    Plus she's got a PHD (Papa has dough), so I won't have to steal, or work for that matter either!

    rebel streak - Eh, I can deal with that. :)

    (as long as she wasn't a ho!)

    very much her own person - *ding ding ding* We have a winner!

    Ariel - Ok, I hear exotic, but not THAT exotic. I mean, not that I'm such a legs guy, but come on, NO legs?!?!

    And yeah, EVERYONE's seen her in a bikini...

    Alice - Blonde? Eh...

    And eventhough we probably have a lot of common interests (definitely the same taste of music) it's not the same kind of fun I'm into anymore. Back in the day though, ALLLIIICEEEE!!! yeeeaaaahhhh. LOL

    Sleeping Beauty - Totally not in touch with what's going on in the world.

    Pocahontas - Way too hippied out. Climbing in the woods? Cool. Living your entire life in the woods? HIPPIE.

    All the others - Agreed with Serch. I'm not into Brooklyn girls.

    And I wonder which character I'd be... Hmmm...

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  32. And I wonder which character I'd be... Hmmm...

    Hmmm. I'm not sure why but I'm seeing a non-Persian Aladdin. Perhaps it's because every time you come to serandez, you've got a different look! :D

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  33. !!!!!

    I don't steal things! I have a car! (Had an apt...)

    NOT AMBITIOUS!?!?

    Talks to a monkey? ummm... uhhhh... How do you know about that?

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  34. I know this is breaking the boundaries of Disney and opening an entirely different area, but I only have one thing to say:

    MR. DARCY.

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  35. And who would be Elizabeth?lol

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  36. yeah, those cartoon guys have no personality whatsoever.

    Personality? Who mentioned personality? What are you female or something? :-D

    Speaking of personality, definitely Mr. Darcy.

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  37. I don't steal things! I have a car! (Had an apt...)

    NOT AMBITIOUS!?!?


    I think Aladdin definitely IS ambitious! He wanted to marry the sultan's daughter, remember??? If that's not ambition, I don't know what is.

    Besides, Aladdin doesn't REALLY steal - he just has a good sense of survival!

    And a flying carpet is waaaaay cooler than a car.

    And Aladdin can climb and things! :D

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  38. Why am I not seeing the Mr. Darcy??? Is this another private joke that I missed?

    *grumble*

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  39. Oh.

    Uh, yeah!

    I want a Mr. Darcy, too!

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  40. Wow, who would have thought that so many young ladies would have a thing for Jefferson Darcy

    I guess it's true what they say, there is just no accounting for taste.

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  41. Sorry, I should have clarified. Fitzwilliam Darcy, landlord of Pemberley. :D

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  42. G, until your last comment, I thought they were all talking about Jefferson Darcy, which I found a bit odd.

    Then I googled "Mr. Darcy" and realized they were talking about Pride and Prejudice.

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  43. You should try literacy, gentlemen. The books are always better than the movies.*



    *With the exception of Disney classics and Lord of the Rings.


    PS: I honestly thought G was joking - first time and I was wrong?

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  44. G was joking...more often than not this is the case (well, at least in this location).

    --as for being wrong...

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  45. G was joking...more often than not this is the case (well, at least in this location).

    Of course you were joking! But it was best to clarify for people like - G, until your last comment, I thought they were all talking about Jefferson Darcy, which I found a bit odd.

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  46. Just don't complain later that your wife is "such a princess".

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  47. There's one big advantage to Aladdin... In addition to his style, I mean.

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  48. There's one big advantage to Aladdin... In addition to his style, I mean.

    And what would that be?

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  49. The fact that he has a genie? And a flying carpet?

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  50. The fact that he's not a prince. Low maintenance, as the label goes. Though I admit, the magic carpet gives him another bump above the average prince. Yeah, I think I'd definitely take Aladdin.

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