...over there (Part I, Part II) and so I thought it might play well over here as well.
**UPDATE** It would appear that while I was away from blogging and carousing in the great white north (aka the alrgest suburb in North America...Canada) someone else beat me to this idea. So while you should still feel free to leave your contribution in the comments here, please also take some time to peruse those submissions (you can also vote for your favorites there)
However, we're gonna tweak it a little.
So...Write a six-word motto for Judaism.
This can be for the religion at large or a specific group, wing, movement, faction, camp, party...(I love the thesaurus function, could you tell?)...one more...cult...okay I'm done.
All players are most welcome. Feel free to include, along with your answer, your age, gender, where you live, and what sect (for lack of a better word) you hail from...or not, if you prefer.
Feel free also to punctuate your motto liberally (or, if you will, conservatively); for instance: “Battered? A bit. Beaten? Puh-leeze. Onward!”
The best entry, as decided by a quorum of to-be-determined persons and a batch of capuchin monkeys we keep at the ready, receives her/his choice of Ser&Ez swag.
Ready...set..."Letter "G" Should Start The Alphabet"...aaaaand...go!
Come one, Come all!....Not you.
ReplyDeleteSomeone on DB had a good one:
ReplyDelete"Two Jews. Three opinions. All wrong."
"They're not frum. They're too frum."
ReplyDelete"Oh man, here they come again..."
ReplyDelete"Well, does she cover her hair?"
"What do I say for that?"
"We live by our own rules."
"Because Hashem said so, that's why."
"We are smarter than everybody else."
"Don't wanna work? Say you're learning."
[Oh, yeah, I'm in a cynical mood today.]
From a co-worker:
ReplyDelete"Pay less, buy more. Enough said."
"What?!! More than a Tefach?"
ReplyDelete"Sexism-Because women are more spirtual"
ReplyDeleteIn case you think I'm cynical, you ain't seen nothing yet.
ReplyDeleteConnect with God. On His terms.
ReplyDeleteConnect with God. On OUR terms
ReplyDelete"Because R' _____ said so, duh."
ReplyDelete"Well, the gedolim do it, so..."
"Don't you want to be like...?"
"Are you sure that that's okay?"
"I'm not sure... so I'm machmir."
ReplyDelete"Just in case, I'll be machmir."
Wow, this is getting really snarky and sacreligious, eh? Maybe I'll write some positive ones, too.
"Did you wash the strawberries thoroughly?"
ReplyDelete"If you're normal, Judaism's really nice."
ReplyDelete"Great if you have good friends."
"Great if you fit in well."
"Serving God happily for three millenia."
ReplyDelete(See, that was a nice one.)
Drink brew. Love your fellow Jew.
ReplyDelete"That's how my parents did it."
ReplyDeleteMazel Tov!!...But are they gebrokts???
ReplyDelete"But her classmates don't wear stockings"
ReplyDelete"Mormonism, but without the silly stuff
ReplyDelete"Did he pay his membership fee?"
ReplyDelete"The only place Ezzie finds friends"
ReplyDeleteShema Yisroel Hashem Elokaynu Hashem Echad.
ReplyDeleteNew Chumra? What? No more chumus?
ReplyDeleteAkiva, you WOULD have to ruin all the fun
ReplyDelete"Because the other tribes were lost"
ReplyDeleteMy black hat's bigger than yours!
ReplyDeleteMy yichus is better than your's!
Hey, not nice, HH. I like, Akiva.
ReplyDelete"V'ahavta l'reacha kamocha. V'ahavta l'reacha kamocha."
"V'ahavta l'reacha kamocha. Unless they're [insert option here]." (Reform, Charedi, Modern, Chassidish, Litvish, Women...)
Oh big quiet Ezzie, I was just messing with Akiva and I am sure he knows it. :P His was a beautiful comment
ReplyDeletebe* (not big)
ReplyDeleteNo yichus? no problem. GET OUT!
ReplyDeleteOrthodoxy: Once you're in, you're stuck!
ReplyDeleteThis is a take off on a famous saying, only condensed into six words:
ReplyDeleteWe won, they lost, let's eat!
Also...
Torah: it's good for your soul.
Where we make the mundane holy.
(to the Beatles tune "Hello, Hello"):
You say shalom, I say shalom.
For middle of the street walking.
Side effects include greater weight...spiritually?
Every question is questioned in return?
To learn is to reach machloket.
Where progress equals more complicated arguments.
We're the center of EVERYBODY'S future.
We've got ruach, yes we do!
We've got ruach, how 'bout you?
(those were two separate ones)
Torah and mitzvot: just do it.
Milk and meat not welcome here.
Wow. You're all so . . . enthusiastic. (Not a contribution.)
ReplyDeleteEzzie, you posted too often. I thought it's busy season??
ReplyDeleteJudaism: "Where prayer and enthusiasm don't mix"
ReplyDeleteSaraK - I am busy, but I had to take a few minutes out... :)
ReplyDeleteOkay, how about some nicer ones?
nicer ones?
ReplyDelete"Everyone hates us, pass the lox."
ReplyDeleteNo, you can't do that, either.
ReplyDeleteEveryone hates us. We're still here.
ReplyDeleteEveryone hates us, because we're better.
Everyone hates us. Am Yisrael Chai.
We must be doing something right.
>Everyone hates us, because we're better.
ReplyDeleteI wonder why people hate us?
I was going to take a shot at it, but you people are too good. I'm intimidated. :-P
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete"God loves us. You're just jealous."
ReplyDelete"Love gefilte fish or fake it"
(Alternatively: "Cholent: Love it or fake it." I hate both and my jewishness has been cast into question numerous times because of that)
"Eat, mammeleh."
(not six words, but I favor conciseness)
But for the sticklers:
"Eat some more chicken soup, bubbele."
"Creators of the original Guilt Trip"
Six words cannot properly describe Judaism.
ReplyDelete(I deleted my earlier comment, because some of my mottoes had already been suggested.)
"Bringing chutzpah and nosh to America"
ReplyDelete"A hetter for every occasion" (ok, 5 words...)
"Mangled English makes you sound frummer."
ReplyDeleteBasMelech,
ReplyDeleteYours are terrific! :)
Okay, how about some nicer ones?
ReplyDeleteMine were nice! What am I? Chopped liver? (hmmm, only five words there)
okay, another one:
Oy oy oy oy oy oy.
"Oy oy oy, we're so happy"
ReplyDelete"Traditioooon! Tradition! Tradition! Traditiooooon! Tradition! Tradition!"
Oy yoy yoy yoy yoy, Shaaaaaaaabbos!
ReplyDeleteHashem loves me cuz I'm frummer.
G-d will protect us from cars.
What do you mean, "chillul Hashem"?
Proud member of the Chumra Club.
Income taxes are for goyim, right?
My rabbi's frummer than your rabbi.
ReplyDeleteThe Internet is assur. Libraries, too.
ReplyDelete>G-d will protect us from cars.
ReplyDeletelol
All this positivity is so heartwarming!
ReplyDeleteLook, six words, and not even on purpose.
HEY! I worked hard to stay positive! (or at least not cynical)
ReplyDelete5 words: "Holier than thou since 2448"
We've been around longer than you.
ReplyDeleteYo, what happened? I thought the comments here would go on forever, where is everyone (else)?
ReplyDeleteHe didn't die for our sins!
ReplyDeleteBas-Melech - It's a weekend. Everyone knows that Jews don't blog on weekends. :P
ReplyDeletePlus, a lot of people probably already posted on DB's blog about this.
I loved a lot of the ones here, especially a few of yours...
Judaism:
ReplyDeleteNo nit too small to pick.