[Argh. I can't concentrate long enough to write a real post. Busy season stinks.]
The point of this post was to point you to an amazing letter to (and follow-up by) R' Yakov Horowitz. Please, PLEASE, think about this. Thank you.
Quick sum-up of what I was going to write: My cousin is a charedi Rosh Yeshiva. He surely would love to be spending his seder discussing Torah with his brilliant sons, who I seriously think will be leaders in the future (as he is becoming now). Yet he spent the seder focusing on his divorced sister's little kids, bringing them the most joyous seder they could have, playing games and cracking jokes, pretending to be different makkos (plagues), and handing out candy for correct answers to basic questions about Pesach. I don't think he gave or heard more than one typical dvar Torah the entire meal... the closest was when the 12-year old son of hers wanted to tell over what he had learned. That was his focus - her kids first, so they could feel comfortable, then his own, who were already. They were the most amazing and memorable sedarim of my life.
Pesach isn't just about being neurotic or about one's own self and family and own minhagim and chumros and what explanations we can come up with for the different topics in Maggid. It's about inclusiveness, about ALL of the Jewish nation leaving Egypt together. So include others, especially those who may be feeling a bit alone, a bit down. It's the prerequisite to starting the seder, anyway:
Kol dichfin yaysay v'yaychal. All who want, come and eat.Don't just think about it. Actively search and call those who may be looking for a little company. It's not charity - it's kindness. Chag Sameach, everybody!!
Beautiful post. Sounds like they were awe-inspiring sederim.
ReplyDeleteI have to say, not being able to be with my own family during Pesach, that it always means a great deal to me that people open their homes and families to me, and welcome me as a part of their table. I feel fortunate that I have found a family who just expects me to be there, just like they expect any other family member. That Ahavas Yisrael goes a long way.
Sorry, nothing to do with this post, but I put up a video clip from last night's American Dad about Jdate. I think you'll really enjoy.
ReplyDelete-OC
great post.
ReplyDeletewith mum in hospital (again) over pesach i'm so thankful for so many kind people who have offered to help out or have us over for meals. (i have sooo much to write for the kindness blog.) but such kindness, ahavat yisrael, hachnasat orchim etc really does make a difference to everyone involved.
(i hope that made sense... i'm kind of overtired)
I think a seder is all about v'higadita l'bincha - telling the story over to the next generation. At our seder, I'm always the one to shift the focus from the "typical dvar Torah" to making the story come alive for the kids. Kol ha'marbeh l'saper? - that's great because the kids can't get enough of it!
ReplyDeleteWow. That's great.
ReplyDeleteSolid post, Ez.
Shoshana - That's awesome.
ReplyDeleteOC - LOL!
Sarah - Aussies rock. :) That really is amazing, and made perfect sense. Refuah shleimah...!
Ayelet - That's the way it should be. I think that having kids is a great lesson and reminder of that for most yeshiva guys, who don't realize how much most people really aren't interested in a shiur during maggid. It's storytime, not lumdus time.
TNSPR - Thanks. :)