Everytime I think life is finally straightening out and getting into a rhythm, something else comes in and wrenches it right back to chaos. Thinking back, I don't think I've gone an extended period of time with a "normal" set schedule since 7th grade. In the 10 years since, there have been short spurts where it seemed things would somehow become "normal" - but that never ended up materializing. To some extent, it's frustrating: once in a while, you just want to get into a good, solid, set routine. You want to know that tomorrow, you're going to get up, go do the same thing you do every day, and come home.
And yet... I'm happy. I'm not sure I was ever cut out for doing anything in standard fashion. I enjoy getting called on to take care of problems when there's almost no time left - it gives me challenges to face when otherwise I might be bored. I'm able to help others where most others can't, I get to use skills that otherwise wouldn't be used, and I get to have fun. Possibly most important of all, I get to bring calm, relief and smiles to people, whether they're good friends or people I've never even met.
A few weeks ago, I was talking to my sister-in-law SIL on the phone. She had posted the Brekher post right around then, and thanks to a few links from others, traffic here jumped a bit - from about 650-700 page views a day to 975 in one day. I didn't understand: Why do I get so many hits a day to begin with? I'd love to say it's my writing, but I don't think I write what I'd call a really good post more than a couple times a week. There are plenty of decent ones, sure, but the good ones rarely get any comments, while the roundups and other posts will almost always get a few. So what keeps people coming back?
SIL answered me simply: This blog is positive. For many people, a blog is where they express their frustrations or complain about issues, where they discuss things that bother them, or a place where they can pretend to be someone. For me, that's simply not the case. I blog because I actually like to. I enjoy reading, I enjoy writing, and have a good time, period.
Woah - falling asleep at the computer... to be continued...