Thursday, January 05, 2012

Maybe

Via the cuz
Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away, and all the neighbors came around to commiserate that evening. "So sorry to hear your horse ran away. This is most unfortunate." The farmer said, "Maybe." The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and everybody came back in the evening and said "Oh, isn't that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!" And he said "Maybe." The next day his son tried to break one of these horses and ride it but he was thrown, and broke his leg, and they all said, "Oh dear, that's too bad," and he said, "Maybe." The following day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the people came around and said, "Isn't that great!" And he said, "Maybe."
The last couple of years have been interesting ones for us, as many readers of this blog are well aware. 2010 started wonderfully, took not one but a number of sharp turns for the worst, before finally ending on a bad note. 2011 started on a bad note, the bad news piled on... and then everything started to change for the better, culminating in a bit of awesome near the end. 

I have always felt that everything happens for a reason - and that much of the time, it will be years before we can possibly understand what that reason was. 

At the moment, while there are still clouds that lurk over us from the past that it will take years to fully get away from, life seems overall rather bright and sunny - certainly, our lives (finally) seem to be headed in the right direction. It saddens me somewhat to know that I cannot fully shake the worry that yet another unforeseen occurrence, some new twist, will ruin it all, that I cannot simply enjoy life as it occurs and be completely optimistic about the future - that no matter what, I am compelled to feel only that "maybe" the positives will last. But despite this, I am optimistic overall, and hope that this path ahead of us is not just another "maybe" along the way. 

It is difficult to think about our lives and notice that others have had generally easier lives in many ways. Certainly nobody knows what truly goes on 'behind closed doors', nor does anybody know what everyone else's troubles are. Nevertheless, it is not difficult to have a general idea of what trials and tribulations people have or have not faced in their lives. It is not out of jealousy nor out of hate that I cannot help but wonder how life might have been had our lives been as easy-going as others have experienced. That said, I can't imagine having lived without learning all the lessons I have learned over these years. 

But I certainly wouldn't mind some easy time...

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