tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post115388191338086713..comments2024-03-02T03:29:09.759-05:00Comments on SerandEz and Friends: The Applicability of Bitachon in Money and MarriageEzziehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12494592434522239195noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1155376216384379512006-08-12T05:50:00.000-04:002006-08-12T05:50:00.000-04:00Your website has a useful information for beginner...Your website has a useful information for beginners like me.<BR/><A HREF="http://jarre.at/digitaldruck_visitenkarte.html" REL="nofollow">»</A>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1155346651448274472006-08-11T21:37:00.000-04:002006-08-11T21:37:00.000-04:00Your are Excellent. And so is your site! Keep up t...Your are Excellent. And so is your site! Keep up the good work. Bookmarked.<BR/><A HREF="http://gosha.at/sport_nutrition_wellness.html" REL="nofollow">»</A>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1154023746205756632006-07-27T14:09:00.000-04:002006-07-27T14:09:00.000-04:00Fiiiine, I'll explain!When I said sex is more impo...Fiiiine, I'll explain!<BR/>When I said sex is more important than money, I was merely stating fact that the inborn drive in all of us, the ultimate motivating, subconscious (sometimes conscious) force, is the natural drive for sex. Sex has been around before money and it's vital to the worlds existence. I'm sure many men and women would agree that there are men out there that are willing to do just about anything to satisfy that inborn urge. Shidduchim leads to marriage, which leads to sex. Noone ever wants to say it outright, but why on earth would a guy in his early 20's who's sitting in yeshiva and is having a heck of time hanging out with his buddies and has got a great chevra, chavrusa and overall can lead a pretty enojyable and fulfilling single life, why would he be in such a hurry to get married? And then on the other hand, why on earth would a non-shomer negiah couple be so anxious to get married after only dating for a year? Why not date for another year and finish school or finish grad school? It's possible you might be able to further your careers first and make more money if you would get married later. And of course all these people, on the entire spectrum of orthodoxy, want companionship, and to experience different levels of giving and love and all of that other great stuff associated with wonderful relationships. But overall, the one thing that everyone cannot deny is the satisfaction of that incredible urge to do "it." So a guy sitting in yeshiva is willing to subject himself to some of the most retarded dating experiences and is willing to excuse himself from enough second seders and night seders, in order to date. And girls are willing to subject themselves to whatever it is they subject themselves, and everyone is willing to put in all this work and do all these wierd, and sometimes completely crazy things because they know that it will eventually lead to the cure of this burning ta'aveh(desire). Meanwhile, eh, money, it comes and it goes, and Daddy's got plenty of it and it grows on trees and, ya know what? What's to worry about? Why should I miss night seder or hold off on a relationship in order to ensure that I have a financially secure future? I honestly believe that just about everyone my age suffers from some form of this, and there a multitude of reasons why (many, I'm sure have to do with the sex-crazed world we live in). I'm just being as blunt and as honest about it in hopes that it will make me more concious of things too. I know I screw up in school all the time, not necessarily girl related, and I know that it's ultimately way more important in the long run than worrying about what my friends girl-friends friends think about me. But of course, which one seems to stress me out more at the end of the day? Not the school work obviously, cuz if it was, I'd probably be doing my term paper right now instead of writing this.MordyShttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18265671954006341688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153970375644242232006-07-26T23:19:00.000-04:002006-07-26T23:19:00.000-04:00Josh - I didn't think you meant that - I understoo...Josh - I didn't think you meant that - I understood you. And I think status is closer to the right answer.Ezziehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12494592434522239195noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153969816817579612006-07-26T23:10:00.000-04:002006-07-26T23:10:00.000-04:00Mordy thanks for the first answer on this thread. ...Mordy thanks for the first answer on this thread. When I said even an answer that paints them in a bad light, I didn't mean I was looking for such an answer. I meant I'll take any answer as long as it's the truth.<BR/><BR/>As for mordy's answer, I don't think shidduchim is about sex, I think it's about status.gordonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03539352623221061766noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153954899348296822006-07-26T19:01:00.000-04:002006-07-26T19:01:00.000-04:00Mordy-Whoa!Mordy-Whoa!Orthonomicshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07892074485262548496noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153931340817892012006-07-26T12:29:00.000-04:002006-07-26T12:29:00.000-04:00Mordy... I don't know what to say, man.Mordy... I don't know what to say, man.Ezziehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12494592434522239195noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153931303595462412006-07-26T12:28:00.000-04:002006-07-26T12:28:00.000-04:00Josh - I'm not trying to paint anyone in a bad lig...Josh - I'm not trying to paint anyone in a bad light, I'm just wondering why people aren't consistent.<BR/><BR/>DAG - Kind of, though I've heard that from people across the spectrum.<BR/><BR/>Rea - You've been watching too many Marx films. :)<BR/><BR/>Neil - Well put.<BR/><BR/>Pragmatician - Picky, yes. I don't think that doing the proper thing will sully anyone's name. If people don't want to marry someone because of it, you probably don't want to marry them either.<BR/><BR/>ExSemGirl - Exactly!<BR/><BR/>Jewboy - LOL. (Sad.)<BR/><BR/>Scraps - Oldie but goodie. :)Ezziehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12494592434522239195noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153930077054684242006-07-26T12:07:00.000-04:002006-07-26T12:07:00.000-04:00Since noone else is going to say it, I guess I wil...Since noone else is going to say it, I guess I will. <BR/><BR/>The simplest answer to your question is that sex is more important than money. I don't think I really have to elaborate. But why do you think prostitution is the oldest profession?MordyShttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18265671954006341688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153923949830001752006-07-26T10:25:00.000-04:002006-07-26T10:25:00.000-04:00It reminds me of the joke (which these days isn't ...It reminds me of the joke (which these days isn't as funny, because it's too often true) where a man is meeting his prospective father-in-law. The pFIL asks him a number of questions:<BR/>"What do you do?"<BR/>"I learn in yeshiva."<BR/>"How will you pay for rent, for food?"<BR/>"G-d will provide."<BR/>"How will you pay for your kids' tuitions, when you have them?"<BR/>"G-d will provide."<BR/>"Are you ever planning on getting a job so you can support your family?"<BR/>"G-d will provide."<BR/>Afterwards, the pFIL talks with his wife about the meeting.<BR/>"Well, the bad news is, he has no job and no plans on getting one in the future. The good news is, he thinks I'm G-d!"Scrapshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15911315552965685448noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153917724121212552006-07-26T08:42:00.000-04:002006-07-26T08:42:00.000-04:00Simple answer: The yeshivish world is taught that ...Simple answer: The yeshivish world is taught that bitachon in parnasah issues means sutting and learning. So all the kollel guys have all the bitachon they need.Jewboyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08192751655374816191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153907825070349332006-07-26T05:57:00.000-04:002006-07-26T05:57:00.000-04:00You can only do so much hishtadlus and the rest is...You can only do so much hishtadlus and the rest is in His hands. <BR/><BR/>Interestingly enough someone recently said to me that all shiddchim are bashert but had I listened to her advice I would be married.<BR/><BR/>I think that clearly sums up the confusion that so many people have between hishtadlus and emuna.<BR/><BR/>It is a difficult balance but ultimately G-d runs it all.exsemgirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13398272406971272000noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153901868406583622006-07-26T04:17:00.000-04:002006-07-26T04:17:00.000-04:00Shiduchim are bashert, but you can push your bash...Shiduchim are bashert, but you can push your bashert away.<BR/>One way of doing it is by being overly picky; another one is by sullying your name for e.g..Pragmaticianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08724757238921859366noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153893154970265882006-07-26T01:52:00.000-04:002006-07-26T01:52:00.000-04:00The problem is that there is a fine line between b...The problem is that there is a fine line between bitachon and emuna. Emuna is proactive. If you have faith that Hashem will provide parnassah, then you have to act on that an pursue employment.Neil Harrishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12797772082427806345noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153886194093069262006-07-25T23:56:00.000-04:002006-07-25T23:56:00.000-04:00DAG - Youre probably reffering to the Groucho Marx...DAG - Youre probably reffering to the Groucho Marx line "I wouldn't want to join any club that would have me as a member."Reahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02649376701210070019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153885178031346752006-07-25T23:39:00.000-04:002006-07-25T23:39:00.000-04:00Its like that line, i wouldn't want to marry anyon...Its like that line, i wouldn't want to marry anyone that would want to marry meDAGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09475799835170867139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153884489767800182006-07-25T23:28:00.000-04:002006-07-25T23:28:00.000-04:00Good question. This is the one question on chareid...Good question. This is the one question on chareidim that I don't have any cynical answers to. It just doesn't make sense. If anyone comes up with an answer even if it paints chareidim in a really bad light, I'd like to hear it. My E-mail is on my blogger profile.gordonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03539352623221061766noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153884262977374592006-07-25T23:24:00.000-04:002006-07-25T23:24:00.000-04:00DAG - How sad but true.JH - That's part of what I ...DAG - How sad but true.<BR/><BR/>JH - That's part of what I was saying in the previous post. Forget the fact that hiding the information protects a molester, hurts the victim by not allowing him/her to get treatment, that it's deceitful, and that other people might get hurt. It doesn't even help achieve what it's supposed to, which is a happy, healthy marriage!<BR/><BR/>Chana - LOL. Exactly!Ezziehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12494592434522239195noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153884000233743712006-07-25T23:20:00.000-04:002006-07-25T23:20:00.000-04:00Heh.My husband and his family knew all about my fa...Heh.<BR/><BR/>My husband and his family knew all about my family, and he married me anyway, LOL. No money, no yichus, a 'shidduch' made by a mutual goyishe friend!<BR/><BR/>No one, on either side, was religious. But snce we've slowly but surely worked more and more Yiddishkeit into our lives over the years, the ILs are furious!<BR/><BR/>Bitachon, Bitachon, Bitachon!!! Surely we had the same shadchan as Adam and Chava. :)have popcorn will lurkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03200484265589054583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153883685490848812006-07-25T23:14:00.000-04:002006-07-25T23:14:00.000-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.have popcorn will lurkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03200484265589054583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153882863737372092006-07-25T23:01:00.000-04:002006-07-25T23:01:00.000-04:00Points well made...In fact, if everyone is lying a...Points well made...<BR/><BR/>In fact, if everyone is lying about what they do or don't do to protect their shidduch prospects then isn't everyone victim to misrepresentation and then no one wins?! Doesn't make much sense to me...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13326001.post-1153882570342501942006-07-25T22:56:00.000-04:002006-07-25T22:56:00.000-04:00How many marraiges have broken because the couple ...How many marraiges have broken because the couple relied on Bitachon with no means of support when they got married, and it was the financial strain they underwent that destroyed their marriage?DAGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09475799835170867139noreply@blogger.com